Proverbs 23:6 - Meaning and Application

People who are ruled by appetite and love pleasure, as in (Proverbs 23:2), are glad to go where they can find a good meal. People who are greedy and stingy are also glad to eat at someone else’s table, so they can save their own food at home. For that reason, both kinds of people are warned not to rush to accept every invitation, and especially not to push themselves in where they were not invited.

Some people pretend to welcome their friends, but they are not sincere. They have smooth words and know what is polite to say, “Eat and drink,” because hosts were expected to speak that way. But in their hearts they resent every bite their guests take, especially if the guests eat freely. They want the credit for being generous, but their love for money is so strong, and their love for people so weak, that they cannot enjoy the meal or the company. A miser’s feast is really a kind of punishment for him. If a man is so selfish and mean that he cannot truly welcome his friends to what he has, he should not make things worse by pretending to be generous. Let him admit what he is, so that a disgraceful man is not called liberal, and a stingy man is not called bountiful (Isaiah 32:5).

There is no real comfort in accepting food from someone who gives grudgingly. “Do not eat the bread of such a man,” the proverb says. Let him keep it to himself. Do not live off those who are generous, and do not make yourself a burden to anyone. But above all, do not flatter yourself that you are welcome where there is no sincere love. A simple meal with true kindness is better than rich food without it.

From this, we should judge the man by his heart. You may think you are honoring him as a friend because he speaks kindly to you, but as he thinks in his heart, so he really is, not as he speaks with his tongue. We are truly what we are inside, before God and before people. Neither religion nor friendship means anything more than sincerity.

We should also judge the food by how it sits with us and whether it agrees with us. He may tell you to eat freely, but sooner or later his greedy spirit will show itself. Then he will make it clear that you are not wanted, and the food you ate will feel like something you have to bring back up. Even the memory of that treatment may make the meal unpleasant, and you will regret the kind words you spoke while returning his compliments and thanking him for his hospitality. You will lose the pleasant words he gave you, and the pleasant words you gave him.